Month: September 2013

     It was a good summer in so many ways.  We sent a happy van full to Kids Across America in June.  That is always such a neat camp where there are so many young leaders who are hip and cool AND really excited about life with Jesus.  It is such a good things for kids to get to be part of.  The culture of their daily lives and our American culture, in general, is so jaded and consumerist and focused on so much that is not of lasting value, that it is really special to be immersed in a week of culture that is totally focused on things of eternal value.

 

     Chris devoted quite a bit of time to loving kids through sports this spring/summer, coaching an additional aau season after our regular season concluded, so that a number of kids would get another chance to play ball before the inevitable narrowing that happens as the boys move into high school and opportunities become more limited except for the most talented.  He also put together another Christ’s Children track team.  It is hard to manage the track meets to fit in around camps and other things.  But, as some of you know, the old track runner who competed through college, gets a lot of satisfaction out of bringing kids into a love of the sport.  And, it is often wondrous to see the kids self-esteem grow as they practice and compete and feel the power of being good at something.

 

     Our Manhood Camp was a special time for our family with Ezra being in his last year as a camper and Javan serving as a leader.  That camp is always a highlight of every year when Chris focuses on the theme, a quote from the deceased, but still remembered urban leader Tom Skinner, “It takes God to be a Black man!”  In our society today, there are so many models of manhood to observe, but few that bear emulation.  It is a good time for the young men to be together and to really dialogue about what it means to be a man, a Black man, in our culture and society.  This camp also, always includes the Underground Railroad Reenactment.  We can gather with young men from two, ten, fifteen years ago and stories are always told about their experience of this at camp.

 

     We had a surprise near the end of July when Owen, a young man in his mid-twenties, stopped by when he was in town.  He told us of his job promotion, his family’s move to South Dakota, showed us pictures of his children.  But most of all, he said he stopped by to say thank you because he wanted us to know that, though he hasn’t always kept in touch, his time with us was very significant to him in surviving the perils and pitfalls of growing up in challenging circumstances.  He is trying to live a life that pleases God as a young husband and father and wanted us to know.  Wasn’t that nice?  Things like that don’t happen every day.

 

     Unfortunately, the enjoyment of that unexpected grace was overshadowed days later by the loss that inevitably takes over all thoughts of summer.  Our beloved Jereau, aged thirty, husband, father and friend to us and our ministry since the age of ten, died by suicide at the end of July.  Only after it was too late, did we come to know that mental illness had overtaken him.  Our hearts are broken and we wish he had been willing to let us know the depth of his struggle and despair.  The despair that comes with clinical depression is not a moral or spiritual shortcoming, but an illness that needs treatment, help and compassion, just like any other.

     So, as fall begins, we press on and we grieve.  I started to cry on Sunday when I called out the number of Jereau’s song and I could hear his voice interjecting, “I AM someBODY!”  We know that he, a child of the most high King, is indeed, safe with Jesus.  We sure do appreciate your prayers.

 

We’ve lost many kids over the years through gang and gun violence.    However, our recent loss was one I never would’ve envisioned…  Our friend Jereau, at the age of thirty, took his own life.  Jereau was a good man with a strong, vibrant faith.  We didn’t know, but he had been struggling for some time with severe depression.  In spite of all the good things in his life, it was hard for him to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  He was suffering from the deep pain that can come with mental illness and he hid it from all of us. 

 

Jereau had beaten the odds.  At thirty, he had outlived what I call, the “young black man’s curse”.  It remains true today, that by the age of twenty-five, out of every four black boys growing up in inner city neighborhoods like this one, one has been killed, one has been in prison and one has been on drugs.  Jereau was the one who survived to become a man.  He grew up in poverty, in a gang infested neighborhood.  He was surrounded by negative and criminal influences in his community, school and family.  Nevertheless, he avoided trouble and chose positive paths and people for his life, graduating from high school and maturing to adulthood.  I pointed to him often as a person for young boys in our ministry to emulate.

 

Tragically, this didn’t have to happen.  His wife recognized that he was ill and needed help and took appropriate measures but the authorities she turned to did not heed her concerns about his mental health and failed to take the necessary precautions.  In a moment of despair, Jereau took his life.  I was the last person to spend time with him. 

 

I’ll miss him dearly.  He’d been with us since he was ten years old.  I know he’s with the Lord.  He was a model to me of the gentle strength of Black manhood.  He was committed to his family.  When his child was born with kidney failure and needed round the clock care, Jereau dropped everything to stay by his side day and night.  Whenever he showed up at our house or came to church, he lit up the room with his jocular presence.  He was a great role model and mentor to the boys in our ministry.  I remember, when we went to Mexico on a mission trip, that he once took the shirt off his back and gave it to a street kid who admired it.  He helped me often working with kids at camp or with basketball.  He was a good friend.  He loved the Lord.  I’ll miss him dearly, but he’s still with us.  In the Lord, he’s still with us and in Christ our family will be reunited again. 

 

I got the news about Jereau on the first night of Manhood Camp.  I was deeply shocked and the grief was overwhelming.  My prevailing thought at the time was, “What’s the use?  If something like this could happen to Jereau, something could happen to any one of the kids I’d ministered to over the years.  Who knows what could  happen to one of the fifteen boys who are with me now?  What I do doesn’t make one bit of difference.”  But the Lord spoke to me…  not in words, but in images of memory, of people who had passed through this ministry and our lives, some who have passed on and some who are still with us.  And when I came back to camp and the boys surrounded me, I felt that same burning desire, that unrelenting drive, that divine call instilled in me…  to love, to help, to serve, despite the personal cost.  It is all worth it… if we can bring just one into the Kingdom.

“I love you coach!”  A group of us were walking out of my house about to go to practice when Jay spoke up.  “I love you too Jay” I replied… but Jay wasn’t finished.  “Coach, I sure do appreciate you, you do a lot for us.”  I’m thinking, Wow… it’s nice to be appreciated, I never get this kind of affirmation from kids.  “Thanks man, I appreciate you appreciating me.”  Then he says, “Seriously coach!  You pick us up after school, get us for practice, do things with us, take us to camp…  no other coach does that for us.  I love you coach and I appreciate all you do for us.”  Now I’m speechless…  I don’t know what to say.  So I just say, “Thanks.”

Jay became a Christian a year ago on one of our summer outings.  I’ve known him since he was ten, as a volunteer in his fifth grade class.  For the last four years we’ve hung out, playing basketball and other stuff.  Last summer he gave his life to Christ.  What you might find funny is that he never comes to church.  I invite him regularly but he is often busy on the weekends.  And this is why what we do is unique.  You see, I’m always pastoring.  We have church at our house on Sundays, and our attendance ranges from five to twenty on any given Sunday… But during the week I’m at school, at the gym, at the park, on the block, even in your house… and I’m always Pastor Chris.  Some call me coach, some call me Mr. Chris, some say “momma who’s that man?”  But I’m always Pastor Chris.  My goal and prayer is to do what my name Christopher implies, to bring Christ.  So even though Jay doesn’t come to church, church comes to him about three times a week;  or rather, Christ comes to him.  I see more than fifty kids a week this way, not to mention their families.

Jay has an effusive, engaging personality.  He stays off the streets and avoids the trouble that plagues a lot of African American boys here by being involved in positive pursuits:  family, school, sports.  He plays on my basketball team.  After he became a Christian he asked if he could invite some of his friends to play ball.  I said yeah and through him I now have a half dozen new unchurched teenage boys on my team.  And they don’t know it, but they’re at church too.  We are about done with our spring season and when we are finished we will have a retreat where they will learn more about the gospel.  They will have a chance to give their lives to Christ.  I fully anticipate that most of them, if not all, will do so.  Not because of my ministerial talents, but because that’s what God does.  I’ve seen Him do it over and over and over again in this ministry.  Many of our kids grow to be adults leading satisfied lives.  Tragically, some do not.  But anyone who participates in our ministry comes into contact with the gospel.

This summer we will have basketball, track, retreats, camps and other activities.  Our kids have an opportunity to do fun and enriching activities, they cultivate relationships with positive adults, and they hear the gospel of Christ.  A typical summer experience for one of our youth involves at least one camp experience, church on Sundays and many outings.  This costs us about $350 per youth.  We are asking you to pray and consider supporting our ministry this summer.  Every little bit helps.  Thanks for participating in this ministry with us through your prayers and gifts.

The Lord bless you and your family this summer…